


I Collect Facts About You Like Treasure

by Caledonia



Series: Dear Merlin, [2]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, Diary/Journal, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Infidelity, M/M, Possibly Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-25
Updated: 2017-03-04
Packaged: 2018-09-26 08:19:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9876050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caledonia/pseuds/Caledonia
Summary: IMAGE HEAVYA one-sided view of complicated relationships as told through Arthur's journal entries.Part Two.---"It's funny to me that I think of you as safe when you may be the only tangible thing in the world that I am afraid of."





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own these characters and am not making any monetary gains from this work.

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	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No images, just prose. Same content as Chapter 1.

Dear M,  
   Well, apparently your roommate and my fiancé have met up on their summer hols. She's French, I think I did say. Well, her parents are. Anyway, she's French and he's over doing a study term in France to advance his language skills.  
   I should be worried that my fiancé is spending her summer holidays with another man. My big sister says I should be worried, but all I can think about is what information she might learn about you and pass on.  
   I collect facts about you like treasure.  
      -A

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Dear M,  
   Our first tutoring session is tomorrow. I can't sleep. I've already chosen my outfit. How ridiculous is that?  
   I hope you don't believe the things they've said about me. I hope you don't think I'm stupid. That's very important to me.  
      -A

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Dear M,  
   You were wearing a Smiths t-shirt and bootcut jeans with ratty converse. You greeted me kindly and shook my hand. I think I blacked out a little when we touched because after the handshake I can't remember anything until the joke you made about solving for X.  
   How is it possible for one human being to be so unearthly beautiful? I can't get the blue of your eyes out of my head. And your cheekbones. And everything else. Literally everything.  
      -A

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Dear M,  
   You set me homework even though it's not class. I love that. You told me to write down four things about myself so we'd have something to talk about apart from equations. I am only shy when I am around you.  
      -A

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Dear M,  
   You smell like home. Not the house I grew up in, no. I mean the idea of home. Somewhere warm and safe where you're always welcome no matter what your life choices or your sexual orientation or your future plans or anything.  
   That's what you smell like. But it's more than a smell. It's an aura. Does that make sense?  
   It's funny to me that I think of you as safe when you may be the only tangible thing in the world that I am afraid of.  
      -A

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Dear M,  
   You put your hand over my hand today and stopped me rubbing out a correct answer in frustration. The feel of your skin on mine went through me like a lightning bolt. A fucking lightning bolt. Including the whole setting things on fire absolute destruction part.  
   If I were a house I'd be burnt to the ground.  
   To the fucking foundations.  
      -A

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Dear M,  
   I had a dream about you last night. It started with you pressed against me in the library, all hands and mouth. It ended with both of us wrapped in a bed sheet and me aching in interesting new places.  
   I lack obvious experience in these types of things but I reckon you'd get the job done proper.  
      -A

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Dear M,  
   She rang last night but I never answered… I was otherwise occupied…  
   I wish I'd never done what I did because now I have a better idea of what it might feel like to have you inside me and that kind of knowledge is very fucking dangerous.  
      -A

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Dear M,  
   This is starting to become a dirty dream journal and that is so very very very not the point.  
   So I'm going to talk about her for a while. She rang again from France, said she's missing me but it doesn't really sound like it. Lance is there for another few weeks yet. She says he's been round her house for tea and do I mind. It breaks my heart for her that I don't.  
      -A

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Dear M,  
   Your leg was pressed against mine during our tutoring session today and I couldn't think even for one second about algebra. You must think I am properly stupid.  
   I could feel the bones of your knee through your pinstripe trousers. Also, while we're on the subject, _pinstripe trousers_? Jesus. You looked about ten feet tall.  
   I watched your hands for the whole session, too, how thin they are and how your knuckles seem too big until you see how incredibly long your fingers are.  
   Tonight I'll switch my phone off first.  
      -A

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Dear M,  
   You're going to take me to the animal shelter tomorrow. I told you I love dogs but I'm allergic and you laughed and smiled and said, me, too. So we're going to the animal shelter tomorrow.  
   I'm engaged to a woman. Gwen. One of your best friends, actually. Someone you said felt like a sister the first time you met her. I wanted to say me, too, when you said that but she's going to be my wife someday.  
   I am engaged, so this can't be a date.  
   I just wanted to make sure we're on the same page.  
   I am engaged, so this can't be a date.  
      -A

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for the thus far positive response! I'm really enjoying writing this one!


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